Yes, that’s right, friends. Comicon is nearly upon us and–
What’s that? No, this isn’t the San Diego one. This is the one in–
What? No, not the New York one, either. It’s in Phoenix.
…well, of course Phoenix has a Comicon! We’re a big state and–
Yes, Arizona is a real state! Who told you otherwise? Well, don’t you listen to that son of a bitch anymore.
Anyway, shut your fat face for a moment and let me tell you how it’s going to go down.
First of all, you should check the Phoenix Comicon Website and see who’s coming! We’ve got a lot of good ones, such as Stan Lee, Felicia Day and James Marsters, famed for his role in the live action adaptation of Dragonball Z (people tell me I shouldn’t antagonize Buffy fans, but I live dangerously). Anyway, you can see what they’re all doing on the site. I can’t really tell you anything about that, since my attempts at stalking them have thus far ended in three different restraining orders (which is going to make this con a little difficult to navigate).
But, since this is the Sam Sykes Show, presumably you’re here to learn what I’ll be doing this whole time. Now that I can tell you, since I have reached the point where someone thought I was important enough to be told what I’m doing (fun fact: the author is always the last to know what’s going on in his life).
But let me tell you.
Friday, 3:00-4:00 PM: Urban Fantasy, Steampunk, Mashups and More!
This will be a discussion of the various subgenres of fantasy, with myself reppin’ the oft-maligned “epic” version. I’m not sure whose reppin’ what else, but if the covers of their books are any indication, I would expect whoever is wearing the tight pants and sporting the back tattoo is the Urban Fantasy spokesperson and the Steampunk expert will probably have gigantic goggles. As for me and my epicness? I’ll be wearing a hood. Come see me, Leanna Renee Heiber, Aprilynne Pike, Kris Neri and J.S. Lewis!
Saturday, 3:00-4:00 PM: Beyond the Vampire and Werewolf
This is basically going to be a workshop on how we utilize various mythical creatures in our writing, giving them those subtle tweaks and ticks to make them our own. This one I’m actually quite looking forward to, as I’ve been accused of finding inspiration for the Abysmyths in every source from Lovecraft to love of crack. Hopefully, this will clear things up for a lot of people, including myself! See it with me, Leanne Renee Heiber and Kris Neri.
Sunday, 10:30-11:30 AM: Sci-Fi Social Media
This one is going to be fucking huge, I can tell. If you can’t make it, let me spoil something for you: there is no way to become a successful author without an internet presence to at least some degree. The world has changed to the point where attention spans are short and the breadth of things to discover are long, hence making self-promotion more important than ever. But we’ll go in depth with it with me, Jack Mangan, Michael Stackpole, Aprilynne Pike, Leanee Renee Heiber and John Motherfucking Scalzi.
Sunday, 12:00-1:00 PM: You’ve sold your first novel, now what?
I might actually have something to say on this one (I intend to put a very realistic wax figurine in my place at the other panels to disguise my natural quiescence), since I actually have a novel. It’ll be neat talking about breaking into the industry, breaking into the reviews and breaking into the reviewers’ houses! This one features me, Jeff Mariotte, Aprilynne Pike, Leanne Renee Heiber and my wax dummy.
There might be some signings. If there is, I’ll be sure to tell you. If not and you want something signed, just seek me right the fuck out! You can recognize me because I will be the guy who is taller than Mark Newton. I’ll sign all things: books, breasts, wives and maybe dead relatives! You can still get stuff from The Poisoned Pen or wherever the fuck you want to!
Be sure to see me there or die!